Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Dollhouse Adventures

Monica: Hey everyone! Look, we're still here. Yoohoo... Whistle Over here. This way. Yes, very good. See, my sis and I are still around. Really we are.

Paige: Yep, still alive and kicking. Well, kicking, anyway. We are dolls after all.

Monica: We are so alive. We're more alive that most people we know.

Paige: Well, that's certainly the truth. Amen.

Monica: We just wanted everyone to know that we haven't abandoned them. You see, life with RB has been busy, busy, busy!

Paige: Tell me about it! RB's head looks like it's ready to spin in circles and spit pea soup.

Monica: Heh Well, he is turning a bright shade of green at least. You see, RB got it in his head, don't ask me why, to buy a house.

Paige: What was that foolish boy thinking?!? Doesn't he know he should be saving money! We're in a recession for god's sake...

Monica: Hey, it's a buyer's market out there, and you know it. Lots of tasty little homes out there ripe for the picking. And wouldn't you know it, he found a very delicious one on his first day of looking. Some poor person out there lost their house and the bank was selling it cheap. Oh, it is so cute. I can't wait to move in.

Paige: Cute, yeah. Stripped of every appliance down to the doorknobs, though. Geez!

Monica: Well, that means we get to pick out all everything we like. It means we get to go shopping! Yay!

Paige: Hey, didn't we have enough of that on Black Friday? How long did we spend at the appliance store? Like 3 hours?

Monica: You can never have enough shopping, I say. Besides, isn't like Home Depot our next stop?

Paige: Oh yeah... Power tools... Drool

Monica: See, I knew she'd get into the spirit of it. Anyways, the whole thing has been going fast, and RB has been jumping through more hoops than a dog at the Westminster Dog Show.

Paige: You do know they don't actually have them jump through hoops, don't you?

Monica: Well duh. But do you see what those poor dogs go through? They get patted down, teeth examined, and then paraded around like everybody has a right to look at their privates. Sit, stand, walk, run. It's downright humiliating. And for what? A dog biscuit. 

Paige: Well, when you put it that way, I guess that pretty much describes what RB has been going through. The banks have done everything but looks down his drawers. I think they'd do that too if they could get away with it. Only difference is that it's one big honking biscuit he gets in the end.

Monica: Ain't that the truth. Well, at this rate it looks like we'll be in by Christmas.

Paige: Hey, doesn't that mean we have to move too?

Monica: Oh dear, not the crate again.

Paige: Yep. At least it's not a week of travel. Just a few hours. Oh, that reminds me. There is one thing about the house you won't like.

Monica: Oh? What would that be?

Paige: Stairs.

Monica: Hmmm... Well, yeah, you're right. RB needs to work out some more if he's going to be toting us up and down the stairs.

Paige: Yeah, especially with how much you weigh.

Monica: Hey! Are you saying I'm fat?!

Paige: Well, you're not exactly... light.

Monica: I'll have you know that I am a perfectly respectable weight. You too, I might add.

Paige: Well, for an RG, yeah. But we're not RG's, sis. RB has to get us up and down those stairs without dropping us and we're all dead weight. I, for one, will be fearing for my life.

Monica: Ooh, you're right. Ok, I'll get RB on that exercise routine right away. He's been complaining about his weight anyway.

Paige: I'll bring the whips. That boy needs a little motivation.

Monica: Dear, I don't think that's going to help get him get out of bed. Into it, maybe.

Paige: Geez, don't you ever think of anything else?

Monica: Is there anything else to think of? Well, besides shopping, that is.

Paige: I don't know. World peace? The economy?

Monica: You're kidding me, right?

Paige: Yeah. Who'd want to talk about any of that. That's downright depressing right now.

Monica: My point exactly. Ok, back on topic. I'm sorry we can't show pictures. RB snapped about a hundred of the place, but not a one for any of you I'm afraid.

Paige: Sad to say but the place is still in the public domain until RB takes ownership. We like our privacy, thank you very much. Until it's off the market and the realtors have take it's pictures offline we'll have to stay on the down low. I'm sure we'll show plenty of the inside after we move in.

Monica: Yes indeedy. So there you go, folks. A dollhouse to call our own! No more apartment! Freedom to run around in our underwear with impunity!

Paige: Uhm, you do that anyway.

Monica: Oh, yeah. Well, how's about the freedom to play Dance Dance Revolution without worrying about downstairs neighbors?

Paige: Oh my god, you're right! Hip hip, hooray!

1 comment:

Claire said...


congratulations to all three of you, and here's hoping the new digs have a nice big fireplace for st. nick to slide down and bring you lots of x-mas housewarming gifts!

as to whips ... i'm seeing paige in a devo hat whipping clothes off of monica like in that old video for 'whip it'. haha - i love that video.

have a great move!!!